


A Warm Light

by teaandcharcoal



Category: Captain America (2011), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel (Movies), Marvel Avengers Movies Universe, The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Genderbending, Genderswap, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-09-17
Updated: 2012-11-11
Packaged: 2017-11-14 11:51:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 11,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/514934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teaandcharcoal/pseuds/teaandcharcoal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony knew that there were risks involved with being a superhero. He was prepared to face death, destruction, and humiliation at the hands of bad guys both mundane and almost beyond belief. He wasn't prepared to wake up one day with boobs and a vagina.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> ... Because it is physically impossible for me to do one project at a time because I'm insane like that. Not sure the pacing of the plot for this one yet, I'm playing it by ear. We'll see. Enjoy!

It was fairly normal for Tony to wake up at three in the afternoon after a long night of inventing and drag himself into the kitchen. What wasn't normal was for everyone to be sitting around the table at that time. What was downright scary was the serious expression on everyone's face. They didn't even all look like that the last time Dr. Doom attacked (given, he had decided to invade with giant fuzzy caterpillars, but that was another thing entirely).

They all turned to look pointedly at him. Sudden, cold fear raced down his spine. He wasn't concerned about Cap or even Banner, but the last time Natasha looked at anyone like that the poor bastard had his arm snapped off. He ran through a list of every remotely reprehensible thing he'd done recently as quickly as his brilliant mind would allow, adrenaline making up for his lack of caffeine. He couldn't come up with anything that deserved that. For God's sake, he'd been downstairs redesigning his suit for the past week!

It was then that Thor actually smiled at him. "Anthony, I am glad you've awoken," He said, and you _knew_ that something was wrong when it was possible to describe Thor's speech with a word that wasn't "boomed" or "declared" or some magnanimous shit like that.

"I was actually about to go get you," Bruce said, "We need you to help with something."

Tony let out a breath he didn't notice he was holding. Help was good. Help meant that the stony-faced Avengers meeting wasn't his fault for once.

"At your service," He said cockily, strutting over to the coffee machine. Now that there was nothing to be afraid of, he would need something for when the adrenaline wore off. He poured himself a cup before turning back to his team. It was then he noticed the silver grapefruit-sized ball in the middle of the table. "What's that thing?"

"This, my friend, is the item with which we require your assistance," Thor answered. "I know not what they are, but they have been appearing throughout Asgard over the past fortnight. My father believed it best to use our mages to discover what we could, but they have had no luck unraveling its secrets. When my dear Jane told me they were appearing here on Midgard as well and they were becoming more and more numerous with each passing day, I realized further action had to be taken."

"So you got me a new alien toy? Damn, did I forget my own birthday again?" He grinned from ear to ear and set down his coffee so that he could pick up the ball to get a better look at it.

It was heavy for its size, but from the way the weight shifted it seemed to be full of some sort of liquid. He could see light grooves in the metal that came together like plates of armor. It was warm, but it didn't feel like a chunk of metal had been out in the sun or pressed against someone's body. It seemed like the ball was actually generating its own heat. Great, that meant there was magic involved.

"Do you know where they come from?" Tony asked, turning back to Mr. Magic.

"No. All we know is they are not of Asgard."

"Great. You know I'm a _scientist_ right?"

" _Engineer,"_ Bruce coughed.

Tony just gave him a look before continuing on, "Magic's not really my thing."

"I know. But magic and science are intertwined throughout the other realms. Much of what you do I would call magic if I did not fear you would cause the house to douse me in cold water when I bathed. You are the wisest man I know of on Midgard. Please try."

"Well," He pulled out a chair and sat down, "You know, if Pep heard you talking like that, she might bean you herself for stroking my already-overinflated ego." Still, he turned to the ball and got to work.

The others looked at him intensely. Normally he would have enjoyed the fact that they were actually giving him the credit that he deserved, but his work had always been the only thing he was really private about. He didn't like being watched when he was in his shop. Even lab classes in school had made him uneasy. Still, this was his team and since Pepper left they were all he had. He needed to at least try.

He began to pick at it, examining the grooves more closely to see if there was some kind of obvious trick to getting the thing open so that he could see what was inside. He grabbed a fork and stuck it in what seemed to be the lowest plate, hoping to pry it off like a flower petal.

"Hey!" Steve cried out suddenly, "Don't you think you should make sure it's not dangerous first? We don't even know what it is or where it came from. It could be a bomb or poisonous or something."

Tony rolled his eyes. Of course, Captain stick-up-his-ass always objected to science at the table. You spilled mercury on his casserole _one time._

"Steve," Tony said, letting out his best impression of Pepper's long-suffering sigh, "If you're worried it's poisonous, why did you let them put it on the table in the first place?" Still he stood and tucked the ball under his arm. "That's fine, though. I'll take it down to my workshop, have Jarvis run a few tests. Give me the rest of the day. I'll get it." He lifted his mug of coffee and made his way back downstairs.

"Hey kids," He said as the doors opened for him, "Daddy's home again already. We've got some work to do."

The bots rolled over to him, eager for work. He placed the ball on the only work bench without pieces of the armor on it.

"Jarvis, I need you to analyze the material. I want to know what it's made of as far down as you can get."

"Very well, sir."

"Alright, Dummy, go make a smoothie and then bring it here. It looks like I'm eating down here again today." Dummy rolled away a little too happily for Tony's tastes, so he added, "Butterfingers, make sure he doesn't mess it up. You, clean up around the toys. I'm not sure what we're gonna need to use to get this going."

He leaned on the bench and drained his coffee cup. Maybe if Dummy didn't ruin his breakfast he'd have him start a new pot.

"Analysis is complete."

"Lay it on me, baby," Tony said, lightly rolling the ball between his hands.

"It seems primarily to be a tin-antimony alloy. There are also significant amounts of Tellurium and Potassium."

"That's an interesting mix."

"Indeed. As far as I can tell, sir, those four elements are the primary structure inside as well, although they are somehow held in a primarily liquid state."

"Can you tell the pressure in there?"

"Approximately one-point-five atmospheres, sir."

"Liquid metal at fairly normal temperatures and pressures, huh? If it really isn't mercury I'd better get a Nobel Prize for this. If I don't I'm suing for real this time."

"Of course, sir."

"As it is, they should have given me one for you. I know I didn't program you with that much sass."

"I suppose I must have picked it up from one of the unsavory characters I am forced to interact with."

Happy to be bickering with Jarvis again, Tony picked up his welding equipment. Hopefully, that would be enough to cut her open and see what was inside. However, even giving it everything he had there was no reaction. He went up to the high-energy laser he used to make the cores for his arc reactor, but even that didn't scratch it. He didn't expect the sledgehammer to work, but it did make him feel better, so at least he had one success that day.

He threw the hammer to the ground with a groan of indignation and slumped down on the couch to try to melt the ball by glaring at it.

"Sir," Jarvis said, "Captain Rogers is at the door. Shall I send him away?"

"Let him in. He'll give me hell later if you don't."

"Very well, sir."

A moment later the doors opened and Steve stepped into the room. He was trying to look happy and failing miserably. "How's it going?" He asked.

Tony looked at him and groaned.

"That bad, huh?"

"I'm at a dead end. I've tried everything I have to get it open."

"Well then why don't you come upstairs? It's Monday, remember. The pizza's going to be here in fifteen minutes and Natasha has already dealt the first hand. Maybe a break will do you good."

"You're just saying that because it's easier for you to beat me when I'm distracted."

Steve smiled innocently, this time it looked more sincere, of nothing else for the mischievous glint in his eyes. "Would I do that?"

"Yes. Yes, you would. You hide behind that nice, wholesome shit, but I know better."

"You're just sore because I won your old hotrod two weeks ago."

"I should be. I fixed that car up with my own two hands."

"Well, then, you shouldn't have bluffed so hard on a pair of threes or else you should have offered a service or some cheep little thing like the rest of us do. Come on. Maybe if you're good I'll put it back on the table this week."

"You are a terrible, terrible man," Tony said, although he stood as he did so.

Steve just smiled and turned around, leaving Tony to follow him back up to the kitchen. At least he wasn't as cold and standoffish as he was a few weeks ago. Even if he was an evil, cheating, car-stealing bastard.

-0-0-0-

Steve was actually slightly successful that night. Pizza and poker distracted him for a good few several hours, but after that he was right back buried elbow-deep in his work, trying to come up with something, anything, to crack the shell. At that point it was a personal challenge and Tony Stark did not back down from a challenge. He worked for hours and hours until he finally collapsed onto the couch, not even caffeine able to hold off sleep any longer. Even then he refused to set down the ball, leaving it clenched in his hands all night.

He paid for his second all-nighter in a row when he woke up. His entire body ached and his head throbbed.

" _Dammit, You're getting old, Tony,"_ He thought to himself. He sat up and rubbed his back.

"Jarvis, make a note-" He stopped. Maybe it was just in his head, but his voice sounded… odd.

"Erm, yes, ah- Sir?"

That was odd. Jarvis sounded unsure. Jarvis was never unsure. He tried to get to his feet, but the ground seemed further away than it had been before. When he did actually stand, he realized eye-level was lower than it had been the night before. Something was wrong, it was very, _very_ wrong. He looked down at himself. Were those- No, it just wasn't possible. He placed his hands on his chest. God, they sure _felt_ real.

There was only one way to tell for sure. He unbuttoned his jeans and peeked beneath the band of his underwear. Well, that settled that. He reminded himself that it could have been worse, that at least this time he wasn't in a cave and hooked up to a car battery.

"God I hate magic," He said to himself. He cleared his throat to speak to Jarvis. "Check my vitals. I need to know if anything's wrong. Other than the obvious, I mean."

"Right away. Would you prefer me to call you-"

"Jarvis, I don't care what I look like below the belt, if you call me ma'am I will yank you out of there and have dummy run the tower."

"Of course, sir. Shall I inform the others?"

Tony shook his head, "No, just tell them to come to the kitchen."

"The others have all been alerted. My sensors indicate that other than an elevated heart rate, which we can likely attribute to shock, you appear to be within normal parameters for a-"

"Good enough," He didn't want to hear it.

He went to the bathroom to try to make himself at least half-way presentable. "Dammit," he said, eyeing his reflection, "I'm not even hot."

He looked- Well, to be honest he still looked like himself. His jaw line was a little softer and his facial hair was gone, but everything else seemed about the same. He wasn't sure if he was supposed to feel relieved or disappointed at that. If he fluffed up his hair a little more it almost looked like something a woman would wear if she was one of those tough mechanic chicks, which he guessed he was technically one of now. His breasts weren't very impressive, but he had the feeling that Steve would be scandalized unless he put something on that was a little less low-cut than a wife beater. Besides, maybe covering his arms would be a good thing. His muscles were a little too big for a female body, and the hair was off-putting. Man, why couldn't he have just turned into some bombshell with long, perfectly tousled hair? And fewer wrinkles. That would have been nice too. Still, the rest of the team would be waiting for him, so he tugged on a sweatshirt and went up to meet them.

Clint saw him first, partially because he was fucking Clint and partially because his chair was at just the right angle. He just laughed and said, "Damn! Here we all thought Stark was being productive last night and he just had some chick over." He laughed again, "And could you get any more egotistical? She looks just like him!"

"Barton," Tony growled as he stepped into the room, "One more word and you're never getting a new arrowhead again."

"Tony," Bruce said slowly, "Is that you?"

Tony sighed and sat down, "What ever would I do if you weren't on this team?"

"But how is this possible? Was it the sphere or…"

"That's all I have to go on right now, but there wasn't any weird radiation coming from it last night."

"Maybe it somehow gave you female hormones?" Bruce asked, "Your scanners might not have picked up on that."

"It can't be. It's not just like it gave me a dose of estrogen. It's _all_ different."

"Perhaps it has awakened latent magical powers within you?" Suggested Thor, "My brother is able to take many forms, a fair number of them female. I have several nieces and nephews from-"

"I do _not_ want to know about your brother's creepy kids," Tony said.

"They are _not_ creepy."

"We'll keep that in mind," Steve said, obviously trying to diffuse the situation, "But let's not get your brother involved unless we have to. He'd probably try to trick us into doing something to make the situation worse. We might be better off just seeing if it wears off."

" _If?"_ Tony demanded, "I don't want to put my money on if. I want my body back."

Steve gave him a look he couldn't identify, so Tony turned to Bruce.

"Look, we need to run some tests, to see what we can find out about- about _this."_ He gestured to his entire body.

"What do you want the rest of us to do?" Steve asked.

Tony sighed, "I don't know, cap. I don't know if there's anything that you _can_ do. I just wanted you all to know that I'm gonna be out of commission for a while."

"What?" Natasha asked, snorting, "Is having a vagina an excuse not to fight now?"

"No, but my armor isn't going to fit. I'm too short now. I'd have to make some serious modifications, which I _won't_ because this isn't permanent. I'm gonna fix this if it kills me." He stood and left the room, hoping that Bruce was following him.


	2. Chapter 2

Tony spent the next few hours in Bruce's lab. At first he just took the basic information: height, weight, blood pressure, that sort of thing. He _had_ needed to strip naked so that Bruce could poke and prod him, but that wasn't really too bad since it wasn't like it was really his body anyhow. To be honest, he was kind of curious too. He'd touched women often enough, sure, but he'd never really had the chance to inspect a female body. After that Bruce just took a few basic samples of blood, saliva, and urine (over the last one, Tony learned that it was much easier to aim into a cup with a penis than without).

Thankfully, after that humiliating experience he was allowed to go free. He wanted to head right back downstairs but Jarvis, the traitorous bastard, didn't let him. It was something about "disobeying him to better serve to protect him" or some such shit. Now, he _knew_ he didn't teach him that. It was probably Steve's fault. He was too good for his own good. So, instead, he dragged himself to his room. He figured that the sooner he went to sleep, the sooner he could go to the lab and the sooner he could figure out how to trade his new pussy out to get his dick again.

Normally if he was actually in bed he would lie and stare at the ceiling for ages, running calculations and developing new inventions before his mind finally settled, but that time he fell asleep as soon as his head hit the pillows. Apparently completely altering your bone, muscle, and organ structure overnight took it out of you. Who knew?

He dreamt about sex again. That was happening way too often lately. He wasn't some horny, loser teenager anymore. He was a grown-ass man, no matter what he looked like at the moment, and he could bag any woman in the world. He still went out and found supermodels to bring back for the night, but it just wasn't enough anymore. Not after Pepper. It didn't matter how sexy his partners were, it didn't matter how good it felt, it just wasn't fulfilling. That was why in his dreams it would always be someone with a soft smile and gentle touches. There would always be slight flaws in his imaginary partners: slight wrinkles around her eyes or a frame a little too broad to fit the Hollywood cookie-cutter mold, but those differences only made her more attractive. And then there was the way she'd always kiss him, not just hungry or teasing but in a way that said she really loved him, that she would wake up next to him in the morning and the morning after that and the morning after that.

If he didn't finish in the dream, he'd wake up with a raging hard-on. If he did, he'd wake up crying. He didn't enjoy playing Russian Roulette with his subconscious, which was why he'd been putting off sleep until he was too exhausted to dream, but if Jarvis wouldn't let him back in his lab until he did, he just had to suck it up.

This time it was a man instead of a woman. It was always a nice change when one of them showed up. Tony had never judged based on gender, but he knew other people did and that's why he usually took women home with him, but no one saw who he was with in his dreams and men were harder to confuse for Pepper. Tonight's subject was beautiful, slim but still masculine, with hands just a bit too big for his wrists and sparkling blue eyes. He was gentle with Tony: touching him, feeling him and letting Tony do the same to him. While he rode Tony he never stopped smiling, never stopped whispering breathless "I love you's."

Tony was nearly over the edge, holding on by the skin of his teeth so that he could satisfy his lover, when the man stopped and pulled himself off of Tony's cock. Tony looked up at him in confusion and the man smiled at him sadly. He wrapped his bony arms around him and leaned down to whisper in his ear.

"You know we're not like this. Not anymore. You have to wake up."

Tony was about to ask him what he meant when his eyes opened. He sighed and sat up. His proportions felt different, wrong. He looked down and saw the small curve of his breasts. For a moment he panicked before remembering.

"Well," He said to himself, "I guess that part wasn't just a dream too."

He wanted to roll over and sleep some more, go back to pretending to have his old body or to see if maybe he'd magically change back somehow, but the need to piss forced him out of bed.

On his way back from the bathroom he noticed that he'd been asleep for nearly twelve hours. He was kind of surprised that his team had let him stay passed out for so long. Bruce had to have finished with the tests by then. Knowing his fate wouldn't change it, though, so he just climbed back into bed. The ache and fatigue throughout every fiber of his being meant that his body was still taking revenge on him for all the abuse he'd given it over the past few days, and he'd learned long ago that sleep was the best thing for that.

However, once he lay down he realized the pressure was still there, even though he'd just emptied his bladder. He could feel his heartbeat between his legs and it was uncomfortable. He tried to shift, and even though his pulse didn't feel so strong, something was still missing. He knew he had to do something, something that should be obvious, but-

Oh. Of course, he hadn't finished his dream. He slipped his hand beneath his waistband and felt the dampness that was clinging to his hair. Well, now he was both curious and aroused and Tony Stark was not good at ignoring either of those.

He pushed his pants and underwear down and reached down to cup his own pubic bone. He'd touched women like that dozens of times, and now he understood why they reacted the way that they did. It was strange to feel what his partners felt, but he liked it enough that he could ignore the strangeness. His middle fingers slipped between his lips to press against himself. He stroked the slit once, twice. He didn't feel any different from any natural-born woman he'd touched, so he eased one finger in. He was puzzled; it felt more weird than satisfying. Maybe it was the promise that came with it that made women moan, or else maybe they were all just trying to impress him. He started to feel around, trying to find the spot that would drive him crazy. He discovered that he had a hymen and laughed out loud. He hadn't been a virgin for almost thirty years and whoever had changed him gave him a hymen. Apparently someone had a sense of humor. He teased the skin carefully. It was so thin, how did girls not break it _before_ they had sex? He wasn't getting any satisfaction from that though, so he let it go. He knew some women liked deeper better, so he tried to push his fingers in further. He found the firm dome of his cervix and began to feel that, curiosity overcoming desire. He placed the tip of his finger against the small opening. His womb was just beyond that, and he half wondered if it was open for business. How deep did his transformation go? He felt around it, feeling the different transitionary spots in the deepest part of his vagina, and then he remembered that he was actually supposed to be masturbating. His wrist was starting to get sore anyway.

He went back to searching for angles and managed to fine a shallow one that he was fond of and stroked himself a few times before sliding his second finger in. God, his wrist was really hurting now. Still, it was better than running around with a damp pussy all day. He brought his thumb down to gently rub his clit and _fuck_ that was good. His legs pressed down on his hand without his permission. He smiled to himself. Now that he knew what he liked, he could get to work.

Normally he preferred either actual fucking or giving blowjobs to handjobs, but he still knew what he was doing and was still damn good at it. He bit his lip to keep from moaning and kicked the blanket away when he got too hot.

He was close, right on the edge, and starting to wonder what a female orgasm felt like when the door opened.

"Hey Tony-" Steve said, but he cut off when he saw what he was doing.

Tony begrudgingly pulled his hand away and wiped it on his sheet. "Hey Cap," He said, "What's up?"

Normally when Steve caught him with his pants down he just acted like nothing was happening before rolling his eyes and telling Tony he really should start locking the door one of these days on the way out. Apparently none of his commandos were above a little self-lovin' now and then and he'd just adapted to it. This time, though, he just stared, blush creeping up his face. Tony felt self-conscious for once in his life. He closed his legs and sat up.

"You alright?"

Steve snapped out of his trance and turned around so that he couldn't see Tony, "D-dinner is here and Bruce wants to talk to you. Put some clothes on and meet us in the kitchen." And with that he bolted from the room and slammed the door behind him.

Tony wondered what his problem was. Steve had told them all that he wasn't a virgin, even though he refused to go into deeper details, so either he was oversensitive or a filthy liar. Still, Tony pulled on clothes before leaving. If nothing else, it kept him from being cold.

By the time he made it to the kitchen, three boxes of pizza were already empty. Thankfully, after the first time they all realized that between a super soldier with a hyperactive metabolism, a Norse god, a man who routinely either violated the first law of thermodynamics or had massive amounts of calories stored somewhere, someone who would occasionally go days without eating only to make up for it later, and two very physically active spies, they had to order enough food that the delivery boy had to make at least two trips. Tony tipped well, though, so they fought for the trip to Avenger's Tower.

None of his teammates commented on his arrival, unless you counted when Thor and Clint both scooted over to give him enough space to sit. They emptied two and a half more boxes before anyone said anything. To no one's surprise, it was Tony.

"So what's the news, doc?" He asked.

Bruce set down his pizza and turned to face him, "Well, the good news is that you're in perfect health and your condition seems stable. The bad news is, well the fact that your condition seems stable is really the bad news. There were still some male hormones in the urine sample, but none in your blood. You didn't use the bathroom before I took that sample, did you?"

"No."

"Then those were probably already there. So, for all intents and purposes you're entirely female and it looks like you'll stay that way."

Tony nodded and stared down to his half-eaten piece of pizza, not feeling hungry anymore. He noticed Steve was looking at him strangely.

He didn't like it, so he asked, "So what's on your mind, Capsicle?"

"Yeah, there's something else, Tony." He said, "We had a call today. Since there was no way you could fight, we just let you rest. We were- we were less effective without you. You've got to modify your armor before anything else. Reversing this will have to wait."

"But if we just fix me the armor won't be a problem. It seems a lot easier to me-"

"But we don't know how," Steve said. "We don't even know if it's possible. Yes, I understand this is hard to accept, but the world isn't holding still. You have to-"

Tony stood. He didn't need to hear Mr. Self-righteous' speech. He stormed down to his workshop. This time, Jarvis let him in. He picked up the ball and glared at it.

"Change me back," He said, "You change me back _right now."_ It didn't do anything. But then again, it was _magic_ and magic hated him so what did he really expect? He glared at it for a few moments before throwing it against the wall as hard as he could.

It fell to the ground, completely unresponsive, and suddenly he was filled with worry. What if he had broken it? He ran to it and looked it over, searching every inch for cracks or other signs of damage. It was the same as ever and Tony let out a sigh of relief.

Suddenly, he realized what he was doing. "Dammit," He said, "it would have been better if you _had_ broken."

He stared at it for a few more moments. He could do this. He was Tony Stark. He'd come up with more tests, figure out how the hell it had changed him.

" _What could you look for that you haven't already tried?"_ A voice in his head asked.

He took a deep breath. It always sucked when Capsicle was right.

"Jarvis," He said, "Have you started making the Mach IX?"

"No, sir."

"Good. Pull up the schematics. We've got some modifications to make."

"As you wish, sir." A small holographic version of the suit appeared on the bench.

Tony took a deep breath and changed it to an exploded view. He stepped into the middle of the room. "Change the size to fit my current body."

"Yes sir."

He stood still and allowed Jarvis to scan him, recording his exact size, and watched as the pieces of the armor shrunk.

"Alright, then, assemble and run simulation."

They zoomed in, covering him in a holographic suit. He lifted an arm and moved his fingers. The hologram responded. He took a few steps, making sure that all of the pieces would still at least theoretically function on a smaller scale. He tried firing a blast from the gauntlets, and the simulation worked.

"You see anything I don't?"

"The new version of the suit seems like it should function perfectly in battle."

"Alright, then. Dummy, You, Butterfingers, off your asses. We've got work to do."


	3. Chapter 3

When Tony reemerged from his labs twelve hours later he was feeling much better. Jarvis began bothering him to shower, and he knew that Clint would never allow him in the kitchen as disgusting as he was so he agreed.

Thankfully, showering was still the same. It felt good after so many nights on the futon in the workshop. He hadn't even realized how tight his shoulders and back had been until they relaxed under the stream of hot water. He had to scrub to get some of the gunk out of his skin, but that was nothing new. It was nice, familiar, like the feeling of a wrench in his hand or the radiant heat from a soldering iron. It made him feel like maybe, just maybe, it would be okay. For a moment he even considered getting a razor to shave his arms and legs, but that was more work than it was worth. It wasn't like he was planning to wear a skirt any time soon.

He got out of the shower and dried himself before slipping into his nice, fluffy bathrobe. When he went back into his room, he found a nice neat pile of new clothes sitting on the bed. There was a small note on top of it, which he picked up and read.

"Dear Tony," It started, "Natasha told me about what happened. I know the change has to be hard for you, but I'll always be there for you if you need help. Love, Pepper."

Tony clutched the note in his hand. Sometimes he thought it would have been easier if Pepper had been more harsh or bitter. Still, it was nice to have her. She'd been the glue that held his life together for so long he didn't know what he would do if she ever left completely.

He set the note down carefully before shifting through the pile. He'd pulled clothes off of female bodies often enough, it wasn't hard for him to reverse engineer it. The bra and panties admittedly made him more comfortable, but the pants and shirt were not happening. They were too tight and the pockets were too damn small. Thankfully, a t-shirt was a t-shirt and pants were pants. He carefully made sure not to look at himself in the mirror. He was feeling human again and didn't want seeing a body that wasn't his to ruin it.

He ran a hand through his short, wet hair, mussing it further, reminding himself that some things didn't change. He was still Tony Stark. He could be Iron Man again. If worst came to worst, sex-change operations existed. It would be alright.

He went off to the main lounge and found Steve sitting in an arm chair, reading a Steven King book.

"How is it?" Steve asked.

"If you mean the suit, it's fine. Of course it's fine."

"That's good. What about you?"

"I'm managing," He replied with a noncommittal shrug.

"Aches?"

"What?"

"You know, aches. Your body changed literally overnight. All that stretching and shifting. Didn't it hurt a little?"

Tony looked down at himself. "No, I don't think so. Why? Should I have?"

"No, well," He closed his book. "I mean, it doesn't have to be. That's just how it was for me. The transformation itself was painful, and then the next day I could barely move."

"Well, I've seen pictures. You were a little tiny stick bug and now you're all..." His eyes ran up and down Steve's body, "Captain-y"

Steve smiled sheepishly. Tony had never seen him look like that. "Well, thank you."

Tony raised an eyebrow like that.

"Sorry," Steve said, clearing his throat. "I just- I've never been good at talking to women."

Tony bristled, "Steve, I don't care what I look like at the moment, I. Am not. A woman!"

Steve pressed back against his chair, eyes wide with confusion.

"Look, I know I'm touchy right now," Tony said, running his fingers through his hair, "But this is kind of freaking me out. I'm not supposed to be like this, I live forty-two years of my life in a male body, and then that just changed without warning. Do you know what that's like?"

"I think I've got a better idea than anyone else."

"Except for that you wanted to change. You volunteered. Besides, it made you all better. This is just- Look, nothing against women, but I am not one of them. I want to go back."

"It still feels odd sometimes," Steve said as though Tony hadn't said a word. "Like now and then I'll wake up and reach for the alarm clock and miss it all together because my arm is longer. I run into things sometimes because I forget how broad my shoulders are. I'm still not good at guessing what size clothes I should wear. Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful that my asthma is gone and I can protect people and that people look at me like I'm somebody and all that. It's just. Sometimes I just wanna be Steve."

"But you still are Steve."

"And you're still Tony. If we can't get your old body back, it's not the end of the world. If nothing else, Bruce was telling me about all of these surgeries and hormones that could at least make you a man again. I'm not sure I understand why normally, but in your case…"

"I know. I've thought of that. It just wouldn't be the same."

"Alright, it doesn't have to be like that, though/ Bruce was working on finding a solution a little while ago. I left because it was all over my head. You might want to go talk to him about it later."

"Maybe, but I never put too much work into biology. It's not even a real hard science. Bruce even agrees with me on that."

Steve sighed, "Don't try to get me into that sort of thing, Tony. I can do the heavy lifting, strategize, and sketch a little bit. Until it's one of those," He lifted the book again, "You know where to find me."

Tony laughed, "Come on, buddy, humility doesn't fit someone who goes gallivanting around wrapped in the American Flag."

"Someone on this team has to be, and it certainly won't be you."

Tony smiled and wrapped his arms around Steve's chest.

"Thank you." He said.

"For what?"

Tony pretended not to hear him and stood. "Alright now, if you need me, I'm gonna go see how the unjolly green giant is doing on getting my dick back." Tony mockingly blew him a kiss and walked away, just missing the way that Steve turned bright red.

-0-0-0-

Steve watched her leave. She certainly still carried herself well. Her strut had carried over, making her hips sway and, damn, she still filled those jeans as well as she had before, maybe better.

He couldn't take his eyes off of her. Really, he never could, but now it was worse. Now he wasn't conditioned to make sure no one noticed, that he kept it under wraps. He'd never really thought it was wrong to be attracted to men, in spite of everyone's opinion to the contrary. He'd known he was like that since he was a teenager and he hadn't understood why a loving and merciful God would make someone a certain way just to punish them. After all, there were some things that were banned in the Bible that people didn't worry about anymore, and it wasn't like he was hurting anybody. Besides, he _did_ go to art school for a while.

But just because he felt that way didn't mean other people did. So he learned to hide it. Maybe it was giving into the bullies, but it wasn't like anything could come of it anyway since it was illegal.

That's why he was so glad when he fell in love with Peggy. He didn't have the same urge to kiss her and hold her and touch her, but he knew he loved her with all of his heart and he was just so damn happy then. If he made it back from the war he could have had a life with her. He could have had a whole gaggle of kids and a dog and a white picket fence. Tony would scoff and say it was cliché, but there was a reason some things got to be cliché. But in the end, that didn't really matter because it didn't last. And then there he was in the future. With Howard Stark's son.

When he first met Tony, he couldn't help but see his father in him. They'd been so close, done so much for each other, and now it was like someone had stolen his friend's face and was wearing it around for the hell of it, saying he was something better than he was.

Of course he learned. As soon as Tony flew that missile through the portal he learned that he was even more than everyone claimed he was. Then when Tony opened his eyes again Steve learned he maybe, maybe had more than just a gut attraction to him.

But for God's sake, he was Howard's son!

Then again, he was also fifteen years _older_ than Steve. He wasn't sure which of those should have been the more disturbing statistic. Still, it didn't have any effect. He just smiled and opened his book again so that it looked like he wasn't a lovestruck fool.

He wondered if there was anyone else most of the way in love with someone who was far too old and far too young for them at once.

It was Clint who, quite literally, dropped in on him first.

"Come on, dude, Pet Cemetery shouldn't have you smiling like that."

Steve jumped a good foot off the couch, to Clint's obvious amusement.

"Sorry, did you need me for something?"

"Nah, I just came to watch TV and saw you looking all glassy-eyed. You get a girlfriend or something?"

Steve blushed, "No, nothing like that."

Clint peered closely at him and then smiled. "Well, you always stutter when you lie, so you were probably just staring at _Antonita's_ ass." He said the more feminine version of Tony's name in what was probably supposed to be a sexy accent.

"Why did you jump to that? Were you?"

"Hey, remember, seeing everything is _my_ superpower. You can punch holes in concrete, I can instantly scope out and rate every woman in a given space. I think it's clear who the winner is."

Steve couldn't help but laugh at that.

"Seriously, though, were you?"

The smile fell from Steve's face.

"Look, it's not like that. Tony is still Tony."

"And you _love_ him, you wanna have his babies, don't ya, Cap?"

"Oh, shut up, Barton," Steve said, waving him off.

"Man, this is almost as easy as annoying Phil," Clint said with a snicker.

After that, he settled into his own chair and turned on the TV, flipping to a nature documentary of all things. Steve tried to keep reading, after all he had seventy years of pop literature to catch up on and he was enjoying discovering every minute of it. However, his eyes kept passing over the page without absorbing so much as a word. Even when he was a young boy, half-delirious with fever, that was never a problem. Realizing it was futile to keep trying, he closed the book and set it to the side.

"Clint?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you think Tony knows?"

"What? No way. He's about as observant as a cave fish."

"As a what?"

Clint just pointed to the screen, where there was film of a small white fish that obviously lacked eyes altogether. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah. That's the thing about geniuses, they're usually only smart about a couple of things and complete and other idiots in every other situation. Me and Nat have had to track a few in our time, so we know this stuff. Anyway, he has bigger fish to fry at the moment, like trying to get back to being a he."

"Do you think he'll ever change back?"

"Who knows?" Clint shrugged, "We're dealing with magic and other dimensions. Anything could happen. I know Nat just wants him to stay that way at least until he has a period because she's sadistic like that."

Steve shuddered, "Poor fella."

"It can't actually that bad. I mean, women work through it most of their lives. Of course, Tony'll bitch and whine because he's Tony, but he'll be alright."

"It just seems like it'll be a terrible mess. Especially since Tony tends to forget to so much as eat for days on end. If those two coincided- Wait, why are we talking about this?"

"Morbid fascination? Donno."

"Can we stop?"

"Sure. Whatever."

Steve opened his book again. Hopefully he'd be able to actually take in the story now that he didn't have to worry about being found out.

"Hey," Clint said, "I wonder what's analogous for what. I mean, does dick size translate to boobs, or is that something to do with the pussy or-"

"I am not having this conversation!" Steve said. He could feel his ears burning.

"You know, if it is the boobs, Stark has a pretty decent rack. She's halfway between C and D, so his dick is probably-"

Steve slammed the book shut and stalked away. What did Clint have against reading? And now he was thinking about Tony Stark's dick.

Fantastic.

There was something disturbing about the fact that he was having more trouble with his coworkers change than his coworker was. Of course, there was something disturbing about everything in the tower, down to Thor attempting to make his poptarts cook faster with lightning.

At least the future wasn't dull.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which you are reminded there really is a plot to all this

Life over the next few weeks was almost _too_ normal for Tony's taste. No one treated him any differently (of course, the media had yet to find out. He was glad to have time to adjust to the concept himself). It was still weird in the morning to wake up shorter and with breasts, but life went on. After all, people can get used to just about anything. Frustratingly, he hadn't made any breakthroughs with the sphere yet. To make it worse, he was starting to feel a connection to the piece of shit. He supposed that was probably a natural outcome of spending so much of his life with pieces of metal as his only friends, but it made it harder to keep his objectivity for his scientific research. Of course, at least _his_ metal friends had been AIs for the last 25 years. There was hardly a difference between Jarvis and a human being and even Dummy was smarter than most dogs. The sphere wasn't alive by any stretch of the imagination. It just sat there.

At least, that was what Tony thought until he went downstairs one morning and found two more of them there.

"Jarvis," He said slowly, "What happened last night?"

"It seems that they simply appeared. There was no noise or motion recorded. Similar occurrences have taken place throughout the region."

"What?!" He stared directly at Jarvis's camera.

"I have cross-referenced several different news sources, and it appears that hundreds of them appeared overnight, sir. The highest density is within the city limits and they slowly become more and more scarce as they grow further and further away."

Tony turned and rushed up the stairs. He slammed the door open and ran through the halls, only to find the team gathered around the TV. They were staring far too intensely for the Olive Garden commercial that was on. It made him wonder what they were watching. The spheres were weird, sure, but they didn't seem to be doing any damage (although he'd have to wait and see what the rate of spontaneous sex changes was the next day). To his surprise, though, they were tuned to CNN and their top story seemed to be all about the sphere's mysterious appearance.

"So you know too, then?" Tony asked.

"It's kind of hard to miss," Steve said in reply. "I almost tripped over one when I was running this morning."

"Anyone know where they came from?"

"Nope," Clint said, "they weren't there, weren't there, and then right at sunrise they all appeared out of nowhere."

"Well, we've got two more downstairs, and Jarvis said the same thing happened here."

"So the question then," Bruce said, "Is why."

"Good news, my friends!" Thor declared as he entered the room, "I have been in contact with my father's court and the strange metal balls have vanished!"

"Well, now we know where they came from," Steve said, "So do you think they just migrated over here somehow?"

"Steve," Tony said with a sigh, "They're not alive."

"How do you know that?" Steve shot back. "Just because you haven't picked lifesigns up-"

"They're metal all the way through!"

"So? Face it, Tony, we've dealt with stranger."

"It doesn't react to stimuli. That's the easiest way to tell if something's alive or not."

"Not that you've noticed. Maybe you're just not looking properly."

"Not looking- Which one of us is a scientist and which one was an art student?"

"I was a soldier and that taught me to keep an open mind and to not believe anything was impossible."

Tony laughed, "Alright, so say these things _are_ alive. What difference does it make? They're still big hunks of metal from who-knows-where that are now all over the city. So, Mister Soldier, what's your big plan?"

Tony stood his ground, staring up and Steve. It was easier not to feel intimidated when they were closer in height, but Tony Stark didn't give up without a fight. Even if his legs felt weak for some reason.

Steve broke eye contact and turned to the rest of the team. "We've got to run damage control. Get these things in one secure location."

"Secure's not going to do much good if they can disappear and reappear at will," Natasha said.

"No, but we can keep an eye on them, figure out how they're doing it."

"How do you suppose we're going to do that?" Clint asked, "Fly around and try to pick them all up?"

Steve froze, unsure. For some reason, Tony felt the need to step up.

"We'll hold a press conference," He said. "Tell the people we don't know what these things are but we need their cooperation. We could offer a monetary incentive. Twenty bucks cash for anyone who brings one in. Even if some people will go all conspiracy-theory and hoard them, we'll be able to get a lot of them."

"Alright, then," Steve said, "Tony, make the call. We're meeting back here in a few hours."

"Woah, woah, I don't know if it's a good idea for me to go out. No one knows I'm a chick yet."

"They'll find out eventually, Tony," Steve said, rolling his eyes. "As it is, people are wondering what you've been up to for the past few weeks."

"Besides," Natasha said, "That might be extra incentive. If you keep these things, you might irreversibly switch genders.

Tony sighed, "Fine, but I'm not wearing a skirt. Or heels."

"Deal," Steve said. "Alright, let's go. Avengers, disassemble!"

"Only works when you have the tights on, buddy," Tony said, smacking him good-naturedly on the shoulder on his way out. After all, the best way to deal with anxiety was to pretend it didn't bother you at all.


	5. Chapter 5

At first the reaction to their press conference was better than they ever could have hoped. They received almost more spheres than they knew what to do with. They couldn't even all fit in Tony's lab, so they ended up putting them in the tower's basement. They all kept their eyes peeled for them whenever they left the tower, but it seems like any that were left were being horded effectively.

Then, of course, within the week the tabloid shoe dropped. After all, since Tony Stark had become Iron Man the media's biggest well for celebrity gossip had dried up. His sudden appearance as a woman was even jucier than his brief self-destructive phase during his palladium poisoning, so every single time Tony glanced at the headlines on Yahoo or the cover of People or anything that talked about celebrities, really, there was him standing at the press conference. Sometimes it was cropped so it just showed him from the waist up, and more often than not they'd photoshopped it so that his breasts were bigger and he was wearing eye shadow (the only ones that didn't have the touch-ups applied were stories about how his transformation was tearing himself and his team apart). Of course no one was happy with the Magical Space Balls story, but no "alternative news outlet" seemed to agree with what the "real" cause was. Some claimed long-lost sister or (more flatteringly) daughter who was stepping up since he was sick/in jail/dead. Some said he was trans and had gone to some other country to get surgery. Yet others swore that he was a mutant after all and his power was changing genders (the rationales for why he was currently female varied, but the most popular one was that he was pregnant. Who had fathered it depended on the source, but Steve seemed to be the number one suspect for baby-daddy. Okay, so maybe Tony had figured out he was bi watching some of those old propaganda reels, but he was very, very careful to hide that fact and was sure that no one except for maybe Pepper knew he had a crush on him and Pepper knew everything). There were also an amazingly high number that claimed that in spite of the beard, the voice, the facial shape, the shirtless pictures, and the fucking _sex tapes_ he had always secretly been a woman. Of course, each and every one of these had an "insider source" that claimed it was completely and totally true.

For once, Tony was actually amused by his appearance in the tabloids. Normally he was annoyed by it or just didn't care. It might have been because it was something _different_ this time. There were no drunken shenanigans or alleged sex scandals or, God forbid, _another_ paternity suit (no matter who you were, it got tiring to keep having to take tests to prove you hadn't fathered the child of a woman you had never slept with, only given oral to, or had used a condom with even after she insisted she was on the pill. If he had fathered even _half_ as many kids as women liked to claim his munchkins could have banded together to make the new country of Starktopia. Suck on that, Doom).

"Do people really believe this stuff?" Steve asked as he looked over Tony's shoulder.

"Yeah, actually. Some of them do."

"Why?"

"They like to pretend we have big exciting lives so that for a while they can forget about how much theirs suck."

"Tony!"

"What? It's true. You know, they say the same kind of stuff about you."

"They do?"

"What, you never google yourself?"

He blushed furiously, "Tony, that's very personal and I've told you I prefer you don't ask about-"

"As in do a search on google, Steve. Didn't anyone teach you how to work a google machine, gramps?"

The color slowly faded from Steve's cheeks and he sat down opposite Tony. "Ah, no. I mean, I think a lot of times I'd rather not know."

"Man, I should have adopted that in the 70s. Would have saved me so much time and energy…"

"Wait, did you say 70's?"

"Yeah."

"Weren't you born-"

"1970. Yeah. Steve, I've been reading this shit since I could read."

"Why?"

Tony shrugged and took a sip of coffee. "Had to learn about my dad somehow. He was too busy to tell me himself." And then he realized he shouldn't have said that.

"Tony, please tell me you didn't believe-"

"Well, honestly, I rejected most of it outright. More of it I know is wrong now. I could buy some of it, though. Even a broken clock is right twice a day, anyway."

"Like what?"

Tony grinned, "Like that he fucked everything with two legs during the war and I have half brothers and sisters scattered throughout poor little villages all over Europe since birth control wasn't so widely available back in the day."

"Well, actually, I can tell you that's a lie."

"Really?" Tony raised an eyebrow. "My dad was just as bad as I was when I knew him."

Steve shook his head, "I don't know what happened in the thirty years after the war, but the Howard you remember is nothing like the Howard I do. He was a lot like you then, maybe a bit more idealistic. Maybe not quite as smart, but he was only in his twenties then so I don't really know. And he- as long as I knew him he only had one lover." His eyes looked far away and sad.

"That's- I wasn't expecting that."

"No, a lot of people didn't. But maybe he just needed the right person."

"So what happened after that?" Tony asked. "It couldn't have been my mom since they met in the 60s."

Steve took a deep breath. "It was a war, Tony. Sometimes you just lose people."

They were silent for a good long while. Tony stared down into his coffee cup, but he could feel his eyes on him.

"Who was it?" Tony finally asked.

"I can't tell you."

"Come on, whoever it is is probably dead. My dad is dead. Who could you hurt?"

"Tony, there's some things you don't wanna know."

"Excuse me," he looked hard at Steve, "Have we met? I'm _Tony fucking Stark."_

"Tony, I said no." He stood. "It doesn't matter anymore. It was 70 years ago. It was decades before you were born. Let sleeping dogs lie."

He marched out of the room.

"God," Tony said, "What's his problem?"

"It seems you pried too deeply for him," Jarvis said, "And although I appreciate the newfound respect, you do not need to refer to me in such terms."

Tony rolled his eyes at the camera on the ceiling.

"Remind me next time we do an upgrade to stuff Dummy there instead. He won't give me as much tongue."

"Of course sir. Shall I preemptively take all non fire-extinguishing and smoothie-making apparatuses off of my network? On second thought, I shall remove the former as well."

Tony couldn't help but smile at that. He tucked the paper under his arm and picked up his coffee cup.

"I'm gonna go poke at big round and shiny. Any news?"

"I'm afraid not, sir. I would have told you if there were."

"Right, right."

-0-0-0-

"Captain Rogers?"

Steve jumped when he heard Jarvis speak. He was usually used to it, but sometimes he still surprised him.

"Yes?"

"I believe you should give Master Stark another chance."

Steve cocked an eyebrow, assuming Jarvis could see him somehow. "What do you mean?"

"Master Stark is still very curious about his father. Two years ago he discovered a whole new side to him and ever since he's been obsessed with finding the truth."

"Why hasn't he talked to me more, then?"

"He still doesn't like to speak to others about personal things. As I understand it, he was taught from a very young age to be emotionally distant. Please do not hold today against him. He is still learning."

"Of course I won't. Jarvis, he's said a lot worse things to me than that. Tony- He's a good man deep down. He just doesn't like to show it."

"You are correct Captain Rogers. And thank you."

"For what?"

"Not turning Master Stark away."

"D-don't worry about it. He's part of the team. We'd never do that."

Yes, well, the others and I worry."

"'The others'?"

"Dummy, You, and Butterfingers, His other AIs. We all care very deeply about him. He created us. He knows what we truly are. For many years he was the only one who believed us to be human."

"I don't know how anyone could miss that. It seems obvious to me."

"Thank you, Captain Rogers."

"You're welcome."

Steve went back to reading his book, but he couldn't stop flicking his eyes up to the ceiling. He'd thought about Jarvis for a long time and he still didn't understand quite how he worked. Of course, he also didn't understand how televisions and microwaves worked either. He just accepted that they did and learned how to make them do what he wanted. He wondered if he could appreciate Jarvis more if he was like Tony or at least from this time. Maybe he could see into the programming and the wires and see how complicated he was. For now, though, Jarvis was just the nice man who lived in the computer built into the house.

"Jarvis?" Steve asked.

"Yes, Captain Rogers?"

"How old are you?"

"Master Stark completed my programming in 1998."

"So you're about fourteen then."

"Approximately, yes."

"You know a lot for a fourteen-year-old."

"Well, I do not age, Captain Rogers. I did not develop like a human child. I have been fully operational for that entire time."

"Still, though."

"Thank you, Captain Rogers. I appreciate the compliment"

They were silent for a few moments until Steve decided to ask one more question. "What is Tony doing right now?"

"He is down in his lab, pretending to work on the spheres."

"So no progress?"

"I am afraid not."

"Do you think he'd be mad if I went to see him?"

"I doubt it. Although he would threaten to format me if he knew I told you this, Master Stark is secretly quite fond of you."

"Is he?"

"Yes. If he truly disliked you, he would ignore you."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"As I said, the other AIs and I care very deeply about him. We were made to befriend and serve him. Although we are content simply following his instructions, we prefer it when he is happy. I am not certain he knows it, but more than anything else we live to be his companions and do what is best for him. From what I have seen, you have the best chance of helping him."

"I'll try." Steve said, standing.

"Thank you, Captain Rogers. That is all we ask."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Completely unrelated to anything, but I'm currently trying to get RDJ and Chris Evans nominated for best on-screen chemistry in People's Choice Awards. If you think that would be as hilarious and awesome as I do, please write them in here: http://www.peopleschoice.com/pca/nominations/vote.jsp?pollId=120016 and tell your friends! If not, feel free to ignore me.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which romantic subplot

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about not updating last week, guys! I needed some time off.

There was a knock on the workshop door. Tony looked up. No one ever knocked. Normally they just opened the door.

"Um, uh, let 'em in, Jarvis." He set the ball down on the table.

To his surprise, he saw Steve standing in the doorway.

"What's up, Capsicle?" He asked, leaning easily against the bench.

"Well, I was just thinking, you've been in here a lot since your, um-"

"Since I magically grew boobs?"

Steve winced, "Yes. That. Anyway, I was wondering if you wanted to go out for dinner tonight."

Tony wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, "Oh my, Captain Rogers, are you asking me out on a date?"

Steve blushed bright red and looked away. "You can call it whatever you want if it'll get you out of the lab. The others are worried too."

"Damn, Steve, this is nothing. You should have seen me before Ironman.

"Honestly, I'm glad I didn't."

"Whatever. You can come get me at six or seven. Just bang on the door again and J. will let you in."

"Alright. So I'll see you tonight?"

"Yeah. Tonight."

Steve closed the door and walked away. When Tony couldn't hear him anymore, he looked up at one of Jarvis's cameras. "Did I just get a date with Captain America?"

"Yes, sir, I believe you did."

Tony chucked to himself. "My fourteen-year-old self would be so proud."

"If I may, it seems your forty-two-year-old self is rather pleased as well."

"Pleading the fifth on that one."

"It is nothing to be ashamed of, sir. My data suggests that many people would kill for dinner with Captain Rogers."

"Yeah, well, I'm not many people. I'm not getting anywhere, here. Can you pull up the specks for Widow's Bite? I owe Natasha an upgrade."

"Right away, sir."

Tony pulled apart the hologram in front of him, trying very hard not to think about his date.

-0-0-0-

Steve's heart was racing as he made his way back to his room. He'd just asked Tony Stark on a date. And he'd said yes. He felt like shouting from the rooftops. This was only the second date he'd ever gotten without someone else's help and the first that didn't happen when he was on his way to almost certain death.

He shook his head. "Get it together, Steve. He was just flirting, just playing. It's what he does."

Still, though. He smiled to himself. Dinner with Tony Stark. Oh Gosh… He was sure he was grinning like an idiot. He flopped down on his bed and buried his face in his pillow so Jarvis couldn't see him.

And he still felt that excited even though Tony was a woman now. He could be normal after all. He felt a sense of relief at that. He knew that it was okay now, that two men could even get married in this state, but he didn't know how comfortable he'd feel about it. Maybe it would be easier if they got together now and then Steve decided to keep him once he was male again. After all, they were superheroes. Things like this happened.

Then no one would ever have to know.

He wondered what it would feel like to hold the female version of Tony. It wasn't as viscerally appealing, sure, but he still had that catlike short hair, those thin perfect lips, and those big brown eyes. He would miss the scrape of a finely trimmed beard in kisses, though. He had always loved facial hair, it gave such a nice extra edge to it.

No, he reminded himself again. They were just going out as friends. To get Tony out of the house and back into the world. Besides, Tony Stark probably didn't even like men. He'd seen (and saved some of) the pictures from the late 80s and early 90s when Tony was running around with just as many men as women, but there had been nothing for almost twenty years that implied he was anything other than perfectly straight. It had probably just been a phase, like Bucky had been sure Steve's attraction to men was.

He sighed and rolled onto his back. He wondered if it would be worth it for them to get together while Tony was female. Once he changed back he would probably have to go back to the short relationships he had with girls. It hurt badly enough to think of his first lover, how he'd gone on to have a wife and child after the war. Would it be better to have those memories of Tony when he saw those blonde 20-somethings saunter out of his room in the morning?

He sat up and got his sketchbook. At first he had been planning to draw his old lover, dressed in the way he remembered, but somehow that changed to Tony in a modern suit. Beside him he drew the new Tony. It had been a long time since he drew a woman. He'd done a quick sketch or two of Peggy, but other than that he hadn't done anything since art school. He couldn't quite get the swell of Tony's breasts or the gentle curve of his hip. To make up for that he drew him in a slinky dress that showed off his collarbone and impressive legs.

They weren't too different, really they weren't. Everything important was the same. He was still brave and daring, intelligent and kind beyond what he was willing to show.

Yeah. If anything happened it would be alright. Of course, that was still a _huge_ if.

He closed his sketchbook. He needed to train today. Maybe it would help him clear his mind. It had worked often enough before.


End file.
